Is technology drifting families apart?

Since the introduction of the internet, mobile phone and PC, Toluwalase and his wife spend less time in face-to-face contact even though they live under the same roof. Whenever he is at home, he is always seated in front of the laptop browsing for top business deals or news. His wife too is always busy tweeting and spends more time with her eyes on the computer than the TV. Toluwalase and his wife can no longer watch a film on TV together. It is no longer a shared family experience as each of them is in his or her world with phone or laptop.

Surfing the internet on phones or computers is making family relationship move from bad to worse. It has gone so habitual that some people take their computers and phones to bed, surfing while their partner is forced to sleep in the wake of the flickering light of phones pixels. The Virtual space aces physical every time. Rarely can any single individual be found in the house at any one time without earphones stuffed in the side of their head or their fingers moving over a touch screen phone.

“ICT is really robbing families of quality time,” says Akintayo Abodunrin, a father. “Apart from Facebook, parents send SMS and BMS all the time. There is a joke a couple always tell. They have a baby so when the mother starts pinging on her Blackberry, her husband will tell their baby: ‘see your mother. She has gone to pick up Kehinde, she has left you alone. The Blackberry is Kehinde while the real baby is Taiwo.’”

Eric Amole-Adams, a father of two, agrees that internet is alienating families. According to him, is almost eliminating physical contacts amongst them. “I know of a family where the husband will vall the wife on phone and talk to her even while in the same house. They no longer walk up to where they are to talk anymore; every conversation is held on phone.”

Tayo Adelaja, a travel expert, says having television in all the rooms in the house created the pathway to alienation which internet only widened. “In those days, television is only one in the house. Now every room is equipped with television hence children no longer have to be in the living room to watch TV. Families now chat on phone, internet as I am doing while responding to your question now. Internet has not really helped family to stay together.”

Yet some people will argue that the electronic life has a positive side. They believe the web has made the world more interesting, far too interesting than the real life. For them, real people, real members of the family are dull and problematic in comparison with the web world.

“The real richness of the cyber world can be found on computers, tablets and mobile phones,” argues Asukwo Etim, a father and artist. Those people who would laugh at others for keeping their TV on at all times will happily sink into the cyberworld, perhaps under the illusion that it is inherently more intelligent and interactive.”

Some people also argue that internet has made communication easier. They think the same kind of controls that families used to put on TV watching should be put on technological devices.

“We don’t have to put away the gadgets,” says Seun Ategbese. Rules should only be set as actual life may be duller, and more prone to conflict, than virtual life. But it has this one, advantage: it is real than the cyber world.”

FUNKE OSAE-BROWN