You don’t value what you have till you lose it

I don’t know if this happens to everyone but sure it happens to some of us who are in our teens. There are times, we get tired of our parents and just think: ‘God please, let mum travel or dad should, let them just get out of the house’.

My mum is a very strict woman. She is what I call ‘a no nonsense person’. She doesn’t take any trash or crap from me.  That is why at times, I often think God should just let her leave the house.  I usually feel she likes to nag or shout which annoys me. At times, I find her questions like annoying. She would ask: “have you turned off the gas cylinder? Have you locked the door? Did you turn on the security lights? Have you kept the stew back in the freezer?” She would ask all these questions and many others. 

To drive home my point, immediately I turned 13, my mum cut down on her domestic chores. She no longer takes charge in the kitchen.  She sits while I do most of the cooking. Then, I taught mum was wicked. I thought she wanted me to suffer. This was compounded by my friends’ experience. They would tell me their mum do the cooking. I thought my mum should the same to me. Rather my mum would only give me compliment. She would tell me the food was okay but it just needed a pinch of salt. She would pretend she did not see me sweating it out in the kitchen while cooking or doing the dishes.

Unknown to me, she was actually helping me. I didn’t get to understand this fully until she travelled to the U.S last month. Most time when she travels, it takes a week but this time it was quite long. I just had the feeling I was going to miss her, at the Airport when I bade her goodbye. I almost cried but I didn’t show it. If she knew I wanted to cry, she would tease me.

While she was away from home, I told myself: ’’Ikepo, mum is not around, you have to take charge now.’ I took care of the house and I realised the regular way my mum reminded me to do things was the way I did.

I cooked my dad’s and younger sister’s food. I realised when she was not in the kitchen with, she just wanted me to have self confidence.  I would do things the way she wanted me to know do things.

One of those days she was away, my sister said she wanted Eba, my dad wanted Semovita. I had to make both food and at the same time, cook stew and Ewedu soup. My sister being the last born won’t even bother to help me at all. After eating, I had to do the dishes.

This brings to mind, my discussion with my classmates after a class session. Some of them said they didn’t know how to turn on gas not to talk of frying plantain. It is either their mum or stewards that do the cooking for them. It then dawn on me to give kudos to my mum. We teens should all be grateful to our mums and parents in general.

Ikeolwapo Olubanjo is a SSS1 student at Lagos Anglican Girls’ Grammar School, Surulere.