They thought I would end up like my mum…I proved them wrong

The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do. Tell me I can’t, and then watch me work twice as hard to prove you wrong. There were haters, doubters and then there was me, proving them wrong. The entire world was waiting for me to slip but I shocked them all, I stood firm and blossomed.

My name is Mercy Gabriel. I was raised in a home laced with penury but that’s not the story. This is the story of the victimisation I went through just because I was born out of wedlock as if that was my fault. My mother had me when she was still in the secondary at the age of 15 and from all indications; many expected me to follow her footsteps.

While growing up, I thought my grandparents were my parents; my aunties, my sisters and my uncles, my brothers but it took the constant ugly words emanating from the mouth of my peers and even full-blown adults to show to tell me that I was entirely wrong.

“Bastard! Daughter of a wayward woman, don’t ever lay a finger on my child again else I’ll deal with you ruthlessly”, a neighbour cursed me for hitting her daughter who had done the hitting first.

For me then, that was only an impotent curse and as such there was nothing to worry about but as time went on, I began to see things differently. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t treated badly at home rather I was pampered in the midst of poverty.

Life took another twist for me when I learnt the true story about my life, how I came into being. One of my ‘sisters’ is my mother and my father does not want to have anything to do with either me or my mother so my grandparents decided abortion was the only option.

My mother still had one year to complete her secondary school education and this would not only affect her academics but also bring shame to the family. So, abortion it was but the doctor said it was risky because the pregnancy was almost four months! The doctor told them this could endanger my mother’s life as well. That was how I got to live. You would say that was a mistake that could be forgiven but was it? I don’t think so.

I learnt my mother was and maybe still promiscuous because she was bitten more than thrice and she never for once learnt her lesson. After she had me at that tender age, took in again when I was barely two years old but again, the father rejected the baby because he claimed the child wasn’t his.

My mother had more abortions before settling down with the last man she took in for. I learnt the man attended the same school with my mother’s elder sister and had always loved my aunt but my aunt was so engrossed in her academics and church activities and never looked his way. My mother was lovable and she made friends easily unlike her siblings but many said she was too loose and they all believed I would be just like her.

When the story of my being was unveiled to me, I decided to be different no matter what it would cost me. It started with me smiling little and setting boundaries. I stayed positive, ambitious, brave, focused and strong. I turned a deaf ear to the negative things had to say about me and dwelt more on the positives, this jerked my confidence level upwards until it was almost touching the rooftop.

I knew I had to be twice as good as those that had what I never had to be able to compete in the real world so, I studied more and made sure I was always steps ahead of my peers but many thought this was only a waste of time and they all looked forward to me working around with protruding tummy just like mother but I was determined to prove them wrong.

School was tough, the challenges grew per minute and sincerely, there were times I felt like giving up or giving in but I remember I have a lot of people to prove wrong. They are those who wanted to see me fail.

My life changed for the better a day after my aunt’s traditional wedding. It was in the village and I had gone to buy some soup condiments for my grandmother. On getting home, I met two young men sitting outside the house. Maybe they were our new in-law’s relatives or maybe my uncle’s friends I thought to myself. I greeted them and walked straight inside the kitchen to prepare the soup.

As I was plucking the vegetables, my grandma walked inside the kitchen with a smile on her face. She hardly wore that particular smile and anytime she did, it meant there was something worth celebrating. I was curious to know what it was but she was not going to tell rather she told me that I had visitors.

I wasn’t expecting anyone and I didn’t have friends in the village so who could this strange friend be, I thought to myself as I washed my hands and followed grandma who gave me the ‘I’m-waiting-to-escort-you look’. She led me outside where the men I had seen earlier were seated but now, grandpa was in their midst and they appeared to be having a nice discussion as grandpa kept laughing.

As soon as they saw grandma and me, the discussion changed. Grandpa gave one of the men the floor to state his mission. The man began by telling us all how he had accompanied his friend of many years to my aunt’s traditional wedding the day before.

“I was thrilled at the thought of been treated to homemade palm wine and other local delicacies I had missed in a long while because I’ve been out of the country for quite some time. Little did I know that I was going to find something more precious than that,” the young man who gave his name as Stanley said.

The young man said he did not come down with the mindset of picking a wife but what he saw yesterday made him change that mindset.

“I saw a group of ladies sitting down and chatting away their time while this beautiful young lady (pointing at me) was busy doing all the chores. I watched her do them without grumbling or even murmuring and I was impressed so I decided to speak to my friend who made this happen to accompany me just the way I did for him but this time, to help me seek this young woman’s hand in marriage,” Stanley said begging me with his eyes not to refuse his request.

The ball was now in my cut and I was asked if I was ready to accept his offer. Maybe this young man does not know all he needed to know or he had not made his enquiries but I was going to save him that time by telling him. I want no cockroaches in my cupboard. If he loves the good about me and hears something ugly about my past, what would he do? Secondly, I wanted to know all about him and I needed time so I’d know what I was getting myself into as well. Done talking, the man got the floor to speak again, all these while my grandparents and the other young man watched without interjecting.

Stanley cleared his throat and told me first about himself. He is a lawyer and he had spent a good part of his life in the United States than Nigeria which is his country. He told me about his life and then about mine. I shocked at all he’d been able to find out in a space of 24 hours and with the bad he said he heard, he still wants to marry me.

As I walked down the aisle with Stanley a month later dressed in my fitted spotless white gown, I studied the look on the faces of those who thought little of me and I was glad I proved them wrong.

Chinwe Agbeze